Still Old School

The suckling allure of my finger as I pop it in my mouth is not seemly. And the papery shame of my spotted hand and the gold ring shining at the knuckle of the finger that slides in, is at best, in poor taste.

“Come on baby, you know you love it,” and I’m rubbing the shoulders, “you act don’t you?”

I’m perched on the ledge of the white dresser. A missing light bulb on the showbiz mirror lends an am-dram sorrow to the proceedings.

“You’d make a perfect Dorothy,”

She’d read OK. She knew her lines, she had the walk and she didn’t seem fake. But she acted it; didn’t become it.

“You really think so Mr Poulin?”

“Call me Harry,”

“Mr...Harry,”

“Sure baby you had all the steps. And you’ve got yourself a great set of teeth.”

She showed them to me and looked down. She’s coy and she’s a knockout. She’s got red hair that burns and she’ll make me young again, for five minutes. Ten if I’m lucky.

I take the plunge and delve my slinky paw down over her shoulder. She doesn’t stop me and I feel awful for a minute as I catch a sight of myself doing it in the mirror.

“Why don’t you turn and face me?”

“Well I’m just not sure,” she says.

“You want this don’t you?”

“Well I suppose you’re still handsome and everything, but-”

“But you want Dorothy though, right?”

“Yes,” she whispers.

I get what I want and I assume she enjoys it for whatever it’s worth. So she’ll get the part, not Dorothy but something, and maybe she’ll get a start out of it, I can do that for her. And I’ll get to look hard at myself in that room, rolled sleeves and a drink in my hand, thinking about what I did with my day. I might wonder at my creaking bones that are such a cliche and my ears that don’t work and I’ll still miss my Jessica and I'll know that if she was still here I wouldn’t be scratching for blow jobs like this.

But for now it’s just here and everyone else has gone or is going. She and I are done in this respect so I help her put on her coat and I kiss her cheek with my dirty mouth. Then I open the door for her and show her out, just like we used to back in the old days.